Old Glory & Old Man River So Saturday was Flag Day, and I've always had some notions about the flag. First thing, when discussing the flag could everyone everywhere not say, "Men died for the flag"? There have been many brave men who have died protecting our country. They went off to war to protect what the flag represents; but no one died for the literal flag. Actually, there was probably some soldier who in the heat of the moment during a battle saw Old Glory lying on the ground and tried to retrieve it only to find out how heavy a Panzer is. The flag is a symbol, albeit a potent one. Still it's just a symbol, and let me make it abundantly clear: Symbolism is for the weak. So to have a holiday celebrating a symbol of something vastly more important and tangible seems a bit silly. We already have Independence Day (a.k.a "We hold the truth to be self-evident that you're a schmo, King George III" day). It would be like having Easter and then "Cross Day". We could have Arbor Day come right after "Woodsy the Owl Day". The other thing that kind off puts me off is the Pledge of Allegiance: I pledge allegiance to the flag of the United States of America and to the republic for which it stands... I have not, nor will I ever, pledge my allegiance to a piece of replacable cloth. It's kind of an absurd concept when you think about it. Oh, and the republic for which it stands? Second on the list. Almost an afterthought. I love this country but it seems people want everyone to love its symbol as much as what it represents. And I try to keep my political opinions close to the vest, but I think the ones most vocal about the flag are the ones who seem to love the flag more than the country and the liberties that it represents. Again, symbolism is for the weak. And while I'm on the topic of symbolism, allow me to state how much I despise literary symbolism. Ever since seventh grade the concept irks me like few things can. To me symbolism in literature can be divided into two types: The literal extrapolated to become a concept: In "Huckleberry Finn" if you ask any educator worth his salt what the river represents, he'll tell you that it represents "freedom". Well, of course. That was the only place they were really free. It would be like if I wrote an autobiography and the bathroom "symbolized privacy". If there is a story where main character A pines for main character B, but B is married, B doesn't "symbolize that which A can't have". It's an actual, literal thing that A can't have. The weak! Random things given meaning like some prose-based Rorschach test: Sometimes a pipe is just a pipe. And maybe Holden Caufield's hunting hat in "The Catcher In the Rye" is just a hat. (By the way, J.D. Salinger is really just a whiny MySpace brat who unfortunately was born several decades before the World Wide Web.) What I'm trying to say is that not everything in a story has some cryptic double meaning. If you want to think Grendel represents puberty or Algernon is an allegory to Xenu bombarding earth with alien souls, fine. But you're missing the actual story in hopes of finding a hidden one. Oh, and symbolism is... well, you know.